from the archives...28 October, 2008
I've been "getting my manuscript ready" for what feels like eons without moving ahead, but it just seems one excuse after another holds me back. Essentially, they are only excuses, but I really do need to prioritize my life right now. And my writing, much to my distaste, has taken a back burner. My family, my health and my kids have to come first, and for that I have no hard feelings.
So what does one do when your writing is put on hold?
As a writer, you want your literary works to be your entire life. It is how you title yourself when anyone asks, 'what do you do?' or 'tell me about yourself'. At least, in the back of your mind it is: "I am Tara...Awesome Writer PhD!" even though your actual job is what comes out, followed by anything else you feel obligated to list. But we all know, it is the writer pushing to stand forward, so bold and arrogant. It is, after all, the only chance for true arrogance when the rest of you, the actual you, isn't so in-your-face at all.
A writer wants to be submerged in their thoughts, facing a monitor or the pages of a notepad at all times; you want to suck in the essence of your character's thoughts and ideas, manipulate their lives into a story--a bit like a puppeteer, I suppose. Perhaps the control-freak side of me? (I'll ponder that another time, perhaps from a couch in a fancy office.) But so many times, it is all fiction, as much as the books you write are.
If only we were all Stephen King's and Nora Roberts's. But alas, so few writers--even good and published one's--do not make a living off their creative soul. So it is onto other things and life must continue around us.
In my case, some things do not. My house suffers the worst. The dishes practically cry from the sink, 'wash me!' and the laundry, well, let's just say I don't care how high the mountain gets or if we more than occasionally live out of the dryer; at least the priorities are there for everyone else. And, sorry, last night's lasagna pan (let's be realistic; more likely three night's ago...), but you'll just have to wait for Guide camp to finish, cookie sales to settle, school trips and homework and volunteering to end, and of course, my health to resolve when it rears it's head. Not to mention my job. Remember? The one that actually pays. Even then, the writing comes next in the line of priorities, after all of that and before the housework. It's the writing I have a hard time saying "no" to.
These are just my thoughts, my rant on waiting for life to catch up with my own set schedule, which is just never going to be wide enough to engulf all I want it to. With a sigh, I set the words of creativity aside with a promise that I will return. And to my loyal fans (oh, they are 'endless') the book will get published in time.
So, in lieux of preparing my manuscript in these few spare moments, here I sit, typing frantically at a blog...(about my writing)...and not working on the writing itself. Just doesn't make sense, does it?
But the dishes are now screeching.
And I ignore them still.
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